Monday, July 22, 2013

Waking up

Ok...so about a year ago(or more)...I decided I was going to blog. It has now been at least a year, and I have yet to actually blog. I have been nudged into having some sort of page to let people know what I am up too creatively as I have joined a team of lovely ladies endeavoring to create wonderful and intimate and unique events (Fruitful Collaborations). My friend asked me to send a picture of myself and a web link. Ummmmm.....let's see. Guess I wish I had a well established website of all of my creative work, but all I had so far from when I signed up was a name and a half written blog that I didn't post. So I will try again. I have recently felt as though after a few years of being in a kind of hibernation and limbo..I have had an awakening of sorts...at least creatively. Reborn after going through the beginning stages of motherhood and single motherhood to be more precise. I am re-learning things about myself through a different lens, a different perspective...and I have to say I really like what I see in many ways. The world is different and I have to say I am much more sensitive in many ways to the world around me.  And in other ways...my skin is thicker, my resolve greater.  I have begun writing poetry and short prose again. Done a couple paintings and written some songs. This is no small feat as I felt often before that by the end of the day, I had nothing nothing nothing left to give, especially creative energy. So, to be in a place where I feel I can do these things, even a little at a time...is so freeing for me.  When I start to open up and let the creative energy flow, the whole world becomes a new place. Light, shapes, moods, textures...they all have possibility to be captured, played with, caressed by my perception and then coaxed into some form of physicality. Maybe in a charcoal drawing, or an arrangement of drift wood painted by characters in my life, a gathering of stones found in far away places....or just the joy of all of the ideas that might not come to fruition....but still cause an almost constant buzz in my head. That feeling of possibility. Of hope. Of expectation that at any moment, a beautiful thing can occur if you are watching. If you are paying attention...or maybe it will happen because you aren't fully aware of your surroundings...but you are open to the notion of art happening at anytime at anyplace.
This is my life force. This is my fuel. This is what makes me happy.